On our last night in Sonoma, we treated ourselves to a nice dinner at “The girl and the fig”. Drinks were flowing, food was delicious, company was fun, it was the makings of a memorable night with good friends! We didn’t even have to pull straws to pick our designated driver since Lorri was pregnant during this girls trip!
Here’s Lorri, being a good sport & designated driver ALL weekend long in Sonoma!
Lorri was a good sport about it too, even though she had to drive someone else’s car she was unfamiliar with in a town she didn’t know well. We were all pretty boisterous, each one of us ready to give direction to poor Lorri in the driver’s seat. The road sign DID clearly state “Right turn only” but our hotel was not in that direction. Somehow we quickly convinced Lorri to go straight. Bad idea! Not only did we narrowly miss getting hit by a car, there was a cop car right behind it! His headlights came on immediately! Thank goodness we had a sober one behind the wheel…but that didn’t help Lorri, because she had 4 giddy friends in the passenger seats!
We tried to contain ourselves the best we could as the officer approached the car. Lorri did a pretty good job of playing up the “I’m from out of town” & the “I’m pregnant” card but boy, he was quick! He asked where she was from, and when she replied “Sacramento”, he said “What, they don’t have Right turn only signs where you’re from?!”
He then struck us a deal! He said that while he went to run her license, we had better think of a GOOD clean joke….and if the joke was deemed worthy, he’d let us go without a ticket as long as her record came back clean. Pandemoinum breaks out in the car as soon as he walks away…us, tell a clean joke? Are you kidding?! Our kids tell us clean jokes all day long, do you think we could remember one under pressure!!? It was too much!
Finally, Dina takes control of the chaos & comes up with the ringer. “Ok ladies, let’s hear it” he says as he’s handing Lorri back her license. Di, lays it on ’em : “What do you call a pirate’s favorite Country?” The silence lingers for a few seconds that feel like forever & then in unison we clamor in our best pirate voices, AAAARRRRGGEEENNNNTINA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He looks at us in disgust, tells us to go back to our hotel & walks away. As he’s leaving , he pulls up next to us & tells us that ours was the worst clean joke he’s ever heard & drives away!
On a more serious side:
We were lucky to have a sober driver but we still managed to almost get hit by our carelessness to not follow the traffic signs correctly. Please be sure to always plan to have a designated driver before you head out for a night involving alcohol. Also, there are many great organizations, many born from tragedies, that offer free rides home if you are too drunk to drive. Here’s one that is close to my heart. If you find yourself needing a ride in Southern California, this group will help you stay alive!